A Terrible Plight

Gather round, dear Readers, I've got a story to tell. It's a goodie. So get yourself some hot cocoa and tuck yourselves in, maybe pull a fat kitteh into your lap. You're gonna laugh, you're gonna cry, you're gonna call out in fear for our hero's safety. But fear not, dear Readers... All comes out well.

Monday night... It's dark, and as I remember there was a certain chill in the air. I was woken to a wee honk and the sound of heavy footsteps (this is where I should tell you I live in a vair quiet neighborhood... So quiet, in fact, I'm routinely woken by the sound my neighbour's sprinklers coming on). Needless to say, the sound of a horn at 1:00 a.m. was startling.

All of a sudden, I could hear me dad racing down the third floor steps (*stomp stomp stomp*) I'm putting in sound effects... Do they add something? I'm not sure their adding anything. Now I'm off track, where was I? Oh yea, so I hear the steps, and I gets all nervous. Me parents are usually tucked into their bassinet long before 9:00 p.m. What was dad doing up?

Next thing I know, he's racing out to the front lawn and (*gasp*) over to Yaris parked safely in his designated spot, all shiny and happy and plump (or so I thought!) What was happening to dearest Yaris?!

(picture me peering out my bedroom window and practically peeing my pants with fear for my dearest BAHS).

Neighbourhood pirates had bootied dear Yaris, taking him captive! They pried open his tiny doors, and pillaged his goodies... A mere captive! Oh poor Yaris! Dad found him with his trunk wide open, and his inside lights on. I'm convinced he let out that beep in protest, calling out to his mommy for help (when really, I know, it's just a sensitive horn, and the punk who broke in prolly just accidentally rested his arm on the wheel... I mean who wouldn't? It's so easy to snuggle into Yaris).

But have no fear, Readers. Our hero wasn't hurt. Those nasty pirates made way with all of Yaris's wicked beats, including Gwen and Avril and the Pussy Cat Dolls. But he managed to hide my iPod car hook-up thingy in his driver side glove compartment. Sneaky Yaris.

I'm also most happy to report they ran off without grabbing my Barrel of Monkeys or Travel Monopoly set. Phew. Now that would have been a tragedy indeed...

So what do you think? Feel good story of the year, or what?